Thank You. Thank You. Very Useful. Very Useful.

Over the last four years I have become a connoiseur of search committee behavior. It has become clear to me that some people out there know how to do an academic hire and some people don't. One thing I have noticed in the last two years is the proliferation of on-line job application processes. Although some community colleges seem to have gone totally paperless, most universities that require electronic applications also make you send a paper letter, CV, etc. So the online stuff just doubles the work a job applicant has to do--not to mention multiplying the number of passwords to remember (this is for the bank, this is for the credit card, this is for email, this is for Podunk State, this is for University of Podunk...). In some cases, I have received requests for paper documents from search committees that were unable to access their own university's electronic system.

But a school we'll just call Hancock State University has figured out a new twist to this whole thing. About a week after my rejection letter from HSU came, I received the following electronic message (edited to protect the innocent):

Thank you for your interest in the position of [number] Assistant Professor in the [XXXX] department at [Hancock State.] Unfortunately, you were not selected for employment in this position. Please do not let this discourage you from applying for other positions that interest you. Your application will remain active for 12 months and can be updated during this period by logging on to [URL] and clicking Manage Application.

[Hancock State] appreciates that you want to become a member of our employee community and wishes you success with your job search.

Sincerely,
[Hancock State] Personnel and Human Resources offices

This is an informational message only. This e-mail address is not monitored, please do not reply.

This is the first time I've received both a paper and an electronic rejection message from the same people. And you've gotta love the timing, right? Hit you once. Wait a week. Hit you again. Just wait till they see my groundbreaking article "Winter Skincare Do's and Don'ts!" Really, it's almost finished. I at least have my @#$%^ together!